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From Rock Bottom to Peak Health—Now It’s Your Turn

I’m Joe Bains, a biohacker and health coach, but I didn’t start here. I completely destroyed my health—Type 2 diabetes, crippling sciatica, and nerve damage left me practically disabled. I needed 24/7 care just to get out of bed, shower, or move.

But I refused to accept that as my fate.

I spent years rebuilding myself from the ground up—hitting dead ends, following bad advice, wasting time, and burning money. Everything felt complicated, overwhelming, and frustrating.

Then, after years of struggle, I had my aha moment—the truth about health finally clicked. Suddenly, it all became easy, simple, and shockingly cheap.

Now, at 57 years old, I’m in the best shape of my life—stronger, sharper, and more energetic than I was in my 20s and 30s. I feel like Superman. And the best part? It’s easier and cheaper to be healthy than it is to be sick.

I Can Get You There in Just 2-3 Months
Most health advice out there? Total BS. The mainstream medical industry is feeding you misinformation—which is why we have skyrocketing cases of diabetes, high blood pressure, Alzheimer’s, depression and cancer.

But I’ve cracked the code. I know what works, and I’ll show you how to do it—fast.

What You’ll Learn in My 1-to-1 Coaching:
🔥 Mindset Mastery – Rewire your beliefs to work for you, not against you.
🔥 The Right Way to Exercise – Maximize results with minimum effort.
🔥 Ancestral Eating – A powerful, real-food approach for optimal health.
🔥 Yoga / Meditation / Breathwork – Ancient practices that supercharge your body and mind.
🔥 Social Eating Strategies – Stay on track without feeling like a weirdo in a world of junk food.

No fluff. No fads. Just real results.

🚀 Are you ready to transform? Let’s do this.

Extra information

This is extremely effective and powerful so you need an open mind and be willing to walk into the unknown.

Location

At teacher's location: Central London, London WC2N, UK
Online via webcam

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General info

Age:
Adults (18-64 years old)
Seniors (65+ years old)
Student level:
Beginner
Intermediate
Advanced
Duration:
45 minutes
90 minutes
The class is taught in:English, Panjabi

About Me

I'm a standup comedian - performed at Brighton, Henley and Edinburgh Fringes and also around the UK and abroad.
I'm a member of toastmasters international. level advanced bronze, so have given countless speeches.
I'm a health freak, do biohacking, currently experimenting with Intermittent fasting and low-carb. Written a book on healthy living.

I'm a Linux Network Administrator and Database administrator so understand computers and networks. did it for 15yrs in London and Switzerland.

I'm a world traveller, been around the world twice, 43 countries so far.

Education

Degree in Computer science
Advanced Bronze in public speaking

Experience / Qualifications

I've done comedy shows at the brighton, Henley and Edinburgh fringes all full runs.
I also perform 5-6 nights a week

Reviews (3)

Thanks for your help. The advice was really useful and I already benefitted a lot. It's definitely a learning process.
Brilliant. Patient, kind and fun. And most importantly, taught my son to juggle. A skill for life.
Joe was very professional and took his time teaching us how to juggle. He made it very easy to get up to speed with everything and was also very funny. He was punctual and accommodating of our needs.
Are you drifting through life without a clear objective? Are you fed up with your lot in life, Job, marriage? I'm a Personal Development Freak. When I left school I was a complete introvert with absolutely no social skills. I was small, weak, slow, shy, introverted, and I realised quite quickly that I needed to work twice as hard as everybody else to be as good as everybody else. so I worked bloody hard and put myself in the most uncomfortable situations to get the maximum benefit. I'm now a extrovert who has worked in many countries as an IT Consultant earning a very good living. I'm also a standup comedian and world traveler ( been around the world twice, I love travelling and meeting new people ) I can make friends with strangers very quickly. I'm always learning and developing where ever I go. I'm also an author published 1 book on amazon. I've done the Millionaire Mind Intensive and the Tony Robbins UPW/DWD. Yoga, Vipassana meditation, Pranayama, Wim Hof breathing, Cold therapy. intermittent fasting, keto, Journey Intensive, Holotropic breathwork.
Do you want to lose weight, gain more energy, and free up 3 extra hours every day? Are you struggling with brain fog, low energy, or lingering health issues? Do you want to take your mind and body to the next level? What is Biohacking? Biohacking is about working with your body, not against it—unlocking maximum health and performance with minimal time, money, and effort. As a Biohacker Health Coach, I’ll analyze your current habits—diet, meal frequency, and exercise—and fine-tune them to help you feel and perform at your absolute best. What Clients Are Saying: 🗣 "I had my mind blown about the possibilities of biohacking. I followed Joe’s 10-day sugar detox and saw incredible results—better focus, health, and productivity! I’m excited to implement more of his advice!" – Richard S. 🗣 "I knew I needed help but didn’t know where to turn. Joe provided the guidance I needed to make real, lasting changes. Within days, I started feeling better." – Agneta L. About Joe Bains I wasn’t always a biohacker. I used to be severely unhealthy, overworked, and broken. My body collapsed—I was transferred from hospital to hospital, with doctors unable to help. For 6 months, I was disabled, needing 24/7 care and barely able to sleep for 30 minutes at a time. I realized that if I wanted to survive, I had to take control of my own health. I spent years studying everything—from conventional medicine to alternative therapies, from nutrition to psychology. I worked with 30+ alternative doctors, tested hundreds of supplements, and dove deep into the science of how the body and mind truly work. The biggest breakthrough? 80% of success is psychology, 20% is mechanics. Once you align your mindset with your health goals, the rest becomes effortless. The Hard Truth About Health People say being healthy is hard. But being unhealthy is even harder. 🚫 Brain fog, high blood pressure, diabetes, Alzheimer’s, and cancer—that’s hard as hell. ✅ Taking control of your health? That’s a walk in the park by comparison. Your body isn’t a car. You can’t trade it in for a new one if you break it. This is your only shot. Are You Ready to Transform? If you’re serious about becoming the best version of yourself, sign up now. I’ll help you cut through the confusion, take control of your health, and unlock your peak potential. 🚀 Let’s get started. I look forward to meeting you at the workshop! (Private coaching available – Any location + expenses.)
Juggling re-wires your brain and makes it 2-3% more denser. I've taught kids and adults how to juggle. If you learn it the right way its quite easy and fast. Hit me up and I'll teach you to juggle quickly and easily. Most of it is me giving you a quick lesson and you go away and practice it over several days then another quick lesson to get you to the next level and then you go away and practice that. small simple steps of about 6 to 12 sessions will have you juggling. each session is 15-30mins as most of it is you practicing what I've taught you. 30,45,60 is for individuals 90,120 minutes is for groups
Biohacking is about increasing health & performance for mind and body. How to survive and thrive in a famine is actually quite easy to achieve as our ancestors spent a long time being hunter/gathers and so our bodies are well built & evolved for this, it's simply learning to turn these innate abilities on and exercising them on a regular basis so that when famine hits your ready for it. From massively boosting your immune system to optimising what you eat/drink so that you can come out of this extremely healthy and with minimum food. How to survive and thrive any food shortages. optimising your mindset and planning your activities so that you come out ahead of the pack to take advantage of whatever situation you find yourself when this ends.

Ask a question

Send a message explaining your needs and Joe will reply soon:
The more detail, the better.
Ex. "Hi, when are you available to meet for a lesson?"

Availability of a typical week

(GMT -05:00) New York
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Good-fit Instructor Guarantee


If you are not satisfied after your first lesson, Apprentus will find you another instructor or will refund your first lesson.

Online reputation

  • Instructor since November 2016
  • Phone number verified
  • Google connected
  • Linkedin connected
    500+ connections

Availability of a typical week

(GMT -05:00) New York
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from £46At teacher's location
from £46Online via webcam

Good-fit Instructor Guarantee


If you are not satisfied after your first lesson, Apprentus will find you another instructor or will refund your first lesson.

Share


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In the class, we will focus on physical, mental, and spiritual health. I will also help you to plan a diet in interested. And with consistency in practice, you can reverse the process. With time, you will feel better. All I need is a commitment to your own health and faith. The Role of Yoga in Cardiac Health The position of yoga in cardiac health is increasingly diagnosed and appreciated for its holistic approach to improving cardiovascular well-being. right here are a few key components of how yoga can advantage cardiac health: Blood stress management: Yoga and relaxation techniques, together with deep respiratory and meditation, can assist in reducing strain levels. lowering pressure can, in flip, reduce blood pressure, which is a sizable chance aspect for coronary heart disease. cholesterol and Lipid Profile improvement: Studies have shown that everyday yoga practice can lead to a decrease in serum cholesterol levels, triglycerides, and unfastened fatty acids. those upgrades in lipid profiles contribute to a healthier cardiovascular gadget. Blood Glucose control: Yoga and conscious respiration sporting activities can also help modify blood glucose stages, which is essential for people with diabetes or those susceptible to developing diabetes, as out-of-control blood sugar can contribute to heart troubles. Weight management: Yoga may be a powerful tool for weight management. ordinary yoga exercise, blended with a balanced weight-reduction plan, can assist individuals in maintaining a healthy frame weight. obesity is a chance component for heart disorders, so weight control is crucial for cardiac fitness. bodily fitness: The physical postures (asanas) in yoga assist in improving flexibility, power, and standard physical health. A more potent, extra flexible frame can better support heart fitness and typical well-being. stress discount: Chronic pressure is known to have detrimental outcomes on the heart. Yoga promotes rest and decreases pressure through techniques like mindfulness, meditation, and deep respiratory sporting events. this will make contribute to better cardiac health by lowering the impact of stress-associated hormones on the frame. efficiency and well-being: As you mentioned, yoga can enhance one's overall performance and experience of well-being. Feeling physically and mentally nice can positively affect cardiac fitness by using promoting a fine outlook and inspiring healthier lifestyle choices. As a part of a complete technique for cardiac health, a wholesome weight loss plan, rich in fruits, vegetables, complete grains, and lean proteins, can supplement the blessings of yoga and support cardiovascular wellness. Consistency and commitment: Normal and regular yoga exercise is prime to reaping the blessings. It calls for commitment to at least one's health and faith within the process. Over time, people may also enjoy upgrades in their cardiac fitness and a standard experience of well-being. In conclusion, yoga plays a precious function in promoting cardiac health by using addressing bodily, mental, and religious aspects of properly being. Combining yoga with a heart-wolesome food plan and making a dedication to everyday practice can be a powerful manner to manage and improve cardiovascular health. however, it is vital to discuss with a healthcare expert earlier than starting any new exercise or dietary regimen, mainly when you have current cardiac problems or fitness issues. This will be a tailor-made class for you! Let's see you on Mat. NAMASTE!

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